todayy. it was the weirdest dayy ive ever hadd.
it was full of fun andd happiness.
yet filled withh with sadness and disappointment.
ive talked to Twin. but before that in class.
ii hadd the gut feelings. ohhh curse my gut feeling.
it was raining some more. thats an even worse omen.
whatt ii feared the most came true..
he admitted larhs. truth was ii was shockedd as hell.
my mind was completely blankk. ii didntt know whatt to sayy.
ii didntt know whatt to thinkk. ii justt told Twin.
whatt ii could thinkk off at that particular moment.
other than that. there was an unusual silence.
ii cried in front of Twin. it was justt. hurtful.
ii tried my best to smile. fake ones of course.

thenn wentt to toilett. on the wayy met Feeqah.
ii cried. ALOT. Nabilahh saw me. she hugged me.
ii cried even more. the feeling. its so unbearable.
ii dontt wanna let my feelings out to Twin.
ii feel. like sometimes its also no use.
andd id justt make him more stress.
id rather suffer alone thankkiew.
Farhan also saw me. he smiled. ii smiled backk (:
before D&T wentt toilet again. saw Nammy.
she tried to keep me smiling. then Abangg saw me.
he asked whatt was wrongg too. ii told him larhs.
afterr school went to Library. then Twin sms-ed.
Shiqin all wentt ahead. left me andd Twin.
we talkedd. thenn..
ohh ii cantt elaborate here. its soo damnn hurtful.
on the wayy backk to school Jannah called.
saying that theyy were going home.
was about to walk to the bus-stop. Abangg saw me.
soo we walked andd talked. comforted me a little.
thenn he told me things too. ahaaah.
good forr youu Abangg (:
met Feeqah at northpoint. took bus backk to school.
computerr lab with herr Shah Rahman andd Shidah.
haahaa it was gereks. me andd Feeqah spamm-ed poeple.
in their blogs that is. ouh we spamm-ed each other too.
andd we were justt beside each otherr. LOL.
had laughs. LOADS. took my mindd off things a little.
thenn listened to LOVE TODAY by MIKA.
laughed our arse-es off haahaa.

im wonderingg these dayys.
whyy the hell am ii losing the people closest to me?
whyy the hell does it affect me soo much?
whyy mustt theyy destroyy thier own lives?
am ii justt in the wayy whenn ii tell them 'dont' ?
am ii wastingg my time?
whyy am ii wastingg my time telling them?
its justt soo hurtful. im losing people ii care dearly about.
its really hard for me.
my life's full of never-ending problems.
whenn 1 problem is endingg. another comes.
EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. im sick of my life.
ii WANT to do things. but people wontt let me.
cause theyy know im not st00pid. ii dontt know what to do.
todayy was heartbreaking. disappointment. sadness.
like shidah said.
'It hurts to see the people you love, hurt themselves'
sometimes. ii feel like ii wanna get hit.
ii wish that id get hit by a car. id have amnesia.
then id forget EVERYTHING in my life.
id start life afresh. a new life.. that sounds nice..
im sorry. shall end here. ii dontt know what else to sayy.

I WANT TO FORGET EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED IN LIFE.

LOVE, AYESHA :(((

I dont entertain no-lifes
read, tag, be nice.
or Leave

honeylovers since 03.02.2009
No-life clan? Click.

Im Ayesha and i keep pepper spray in my back pocket *smirk*

Im nice & fun, but test me & see how long the nice-ness last

I have awesome BFFs; GILERRS!

My J-friends call me Aya-chan & did i mention? Im a japanese-obsessed-girl :D

Obsession for turtles, a passion for writing & a love for ALL acessories! Wanna be friends? Gladly (:

And ILY 亀梨和也 !
KAT-TUN daisuki!
BIGBANG saranghae!

Its me
[♥]LIVEJOURNAL[♥]

Pictures anyone?
[♥]MULTIPLY[♥]

• Must Haves
♥ A ________
♥ KAT-TUN album(s)
♥ Pass O Levels!
♥ Graduate with ALL of 4EC
♥ Singapore Poly!
♥ Go to Japan
♥ Meet KAME
♥ To be a successful AUTHOR

Bloody Monday DVD
Absolute Boyfriend DVD
KAT-TUN'S latest album
go to JE concerts!
Kame's Rayben's degreeless specs
brown contacts
Hiragana/Katakana/Kanji
Work in CM production
Twilight/New Moon/Eclispe/Breaking Dawn

♥ 18 February
KAME/TURTLE STUFF!
accessories accessories! :D
Japanese stuff ^.^v
BIG Turtle or Teddy
Green/Red converse shoes
A memorable birthday ^^

1406 FIREWORKS!
1506 SITIEEE BDAY
1606 SILAAAAAS BDAY
1706 Sitieee's Bday dinner
1906 STUUDY!
2506 NAMMIE BDAY
2506 IFAAAH BDAY
2706 JASMINE'S 20TH BDAY!

FRIENDSTER

GILERRS <33

PRINCESS D, FASHA, KHUZA, SYAZA

Sugars <3

FEE, IQAAA!, IRNA, MARYJANE, MURNIE, ELAHH, NAMMIE, NATT, NICOLE, SITIEEEEEE!

The Classes ((:

[1EA] AZURA, [1EA] NPCC ARIFF, [1EA] DHARSH, [1EA] SHAMEERAH, [1EA] VIVIAN, [2EB] SHEADA, [3EC] SHASHA, [4EC] ELVI, [4EC] MARIYA, [4EC] NURUL, [4EC] WEI SONG

Humans (:

AISHAH, AISYAHLALA, AZRUL, MEEZA, LI PING, SHIKIN, SHINGRONG, SYAKIRAH, TEERA, ZEEKRUL ZULAIHA,

x x x x

CORRINE MAY